I was venting to one of my friend’s once about how lately I’ve been craving change. The problem is, I’m not quite sure where to start. In return, he sent me a quote that said, “You can change yourself as much as possible and change things around you just to reach that goal,” and added, “You just need to do it. Decide what you want and go for it. If you mess up, then start over. There are no rules.”
Change has been on my mind for a while. As we grow older and we’re faced with more and more responsibilities, life can start to become a routine. We wake up everyday, go to work/school, come home, and manage to do one or two things before we’re exhausted and call it a night. When the weekend comes around, we’re too tired from the week to bother to make any plans, or do anything else beside lounge in our beds and catch up on our TV shows. And while routines can be nice and familiar, it can get really boring, too.
And I’m bored of my routine. I’m ready for something to give and just change. Yeah, change happens around us all the time, but it does so slowly. I’m ready for something big to happen, so I’ve been mulling over different options. Should I dye my hair? Should I buy myself some new clothes that I wouldn’t normally wear? Should I join a group or a club, and make some new friends? The possibilities are endless.
In the end, I decided to start small and make this blog.
Growing up, I had journals I would write in everyday and they would usually consist of my day to day activities, any conversation or interaction I had with my crush at the time, and something Harry Potter related, I’m sure. My bookshelf is lined with these journals, so it’s really a surprise as to why I hadn’t started this blog from before because it’s apparent I love talking about my life and have too many feelings. This blog won’t necessarily be like a journal, however, but somewhere where my thoughts could lie.
I’m hoping that with this, I can start to find the change that I’ve been looking for. And without getting too deep, maybe even have a better understanding of who I am, and where I’m meant to go down the line. I’m turning 24 next month, and I have internal panic attacks every time I think about it. Growing up is scary and it’s happening all too fast, but maybe that’s the change I need. After all, change is all about getting out of your comfort zone and doing something you normally wouldn’t. Starting this blog is definitely that.
As Cheryl Strayed once wrote, “It isn’t too late. Time is not running out. Your life is here and now, and the moment has arrived at which you’re finally ready to change.”
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